Not to be confused with the caustic chemical used in making soap, LYE refers to my new philosophy about life: Lower Your Expectations.
I got the idea from my mom one day during a tearful phone call about how my house was (is) a mess, my baby wouldn't (won't) sleep, and my bed wasn't (isn't) made. Actually, my baby IS asleep at the moment and my bed does happen to be made, but we'll get to that.
Anyway, my mom said, "So your bed isn't made. So what? I heard a story about this very happy woman who, when asked why she was so happy, said 'I've lowered my expectations.' It's hard to do, but you can do it!"
I've thought a lot about this idea, and I have to say I'm beginning to wholeheartedly agree.
Now I'm not advocating that I shouldn't require anything of myself (or others), but as one who chronically expects super-human feats from just about everything with a pulse, I think it would be wise for me to just chill out and LYE a little - while still doing the best I can.
And for the record, the "best I can" on most days means taking a shower and keeping the baby alive.
So no more crying over the unmade bed, no more nail-biting, guilt-ridden angst over the unfinished scrapbooks, no more bemoaning my lack of artistic/sewing/gardening/cooking talent. No more 'shoulding' on myself, as it were.
So how is it that the bed is made, dishes done, laundry humming, baby asleep right now? Just a lucky day, I guess. I had the energy for it, baby cooperated, and my 'best' today included those things.
But absolutely no promises about tomorrow. And that's a LYE.
11 comments:
Let me tout a talent of yours: you used the word "angst" in an everyday sentence. I had that as one of my blogman bluff words and had to pretend it was a typo for "against." Pretty impressive. Don't worry, though, my expectations aren't so high that you need to feel like you should use "angst" in every post.
Good luck, Brittany. Sometimes it is hard to LYE, but I've learned from experience that not doing so can be disasterous.
I thought this would be love your enemies. Next time, huh?
(BTW, Seth claims he is our enemy. Bry: But Seth, people don't like mean guys. Seth: Darth Wader likes mean guys.)
Good post. You are absolutely right that if the baby is alive it's a good day. I don't know how moms do it. Christmas break is enough to remind me that I don't have all the patience as a parent that I'd like to.
Sweet post. I've lowered my expectations... and loosened my belt.
oops, that was Matt ... awkward
Brittany I think I will get right to needlepointing that on a pillow! Or maybe not-because I am wholeheartedly jumping on the LYE bandwagon. Quick question though-how low can I go?
What an excellent post!!!
I know the gal that mom was talking about, and ironically, she reminds me of you.
(smile)
Brittany -- you are amazing -- that is all. Thanks for the insight.
My Revised To Do List for the day:
1. Lower my expectations.
Done.
What an excellent idea! I love it.
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