In my dreams

Last night found me sitting in my old Sunday School class at home in Colorado, being interviewed by a local news station. They had told me earlier that my family had been killed that week (I don't know how, but I was devastated), and the station was now following up with me about the grieving process.
At the end of the interview, the news anchor woman informed me that my family actually WASN'T dead, she was just conducting some research about the pain involved in losing someone close. "We've found that losing a spouse is most like being bitten by a dog, whereas losing a child is a lot like being repeatedly stung by a bee. So do you think we should start using icons like this in our newscast?" She produced an orange birthday cake decorated with a bee and with four blue candles perched on one corner. I grabbed the cake and shouted, "NO!!! You guys are insane! I can't believe you idiots made me think my family was dead for this!" and then ran out of the room.

Then the baby woke up, so I fed him and put him back to sleep.

I returned to bed only to be confronted by my sister-in-law, who was irate that she had missed a really good deal at Kentucky Fried Chicken. She was thrilled, however, to present her husband with $5 in cash, which represented all the money they had left after paying the bills for that month. They stood hugging and crying in their kitchen, and I bowed out, confused.

Then baby woke up again.

Back to bed for the third time. Now I was on a bus of rowdy teenagers, and I was one again too. We were on our way up to some kind of camp, and I didn't know a soul. Next thing I knew we were all wearing bright green t-shirts and hiking up a really steep hill. I realized with horror that my shorts were very, very short and that I hadn't shaved my legs in a long time. By the time I reached the camp itself, there were only a few people milling around as I tried to figure out where to go. I found out from a short, dark-haired girl that we were all assigned to teams - well, all except for me and one blond girl standing close by.
So the blond girl approached the adult leader of a group of boys who were playing soccer in a big quad area. She explained that she needed a team, and the man stopped the game and asked everyone who wanted her on their team. All of the hands around the quad went up, and she joined a team. I figured that didn't look too hard, so I also went up to the man and asked for a team. He again stopped the game. But this time, after he got everyone's attention, he shook his head meaningfully. "Who wants this one?" Silence. No hands went up. The dark-haired girl who had helped me before burst into tears and sobbed something about how the man wouldn't let anyone volunteer to have me on their team. "But he's the one who looks stupid, not you." To that I replied, "Yeah, at least I don't have a word partly shaved into the back of my head." The mean man, who did have the letters BL shaved on one side of the back of his head, pointed at me and said "You will NOT be attending the opening ceremonies." I was just sticking my tongue out at him when...you guessed it: baby woke up again.

Between those nutty dreams and getting up three times with the boy, I feel like I didn't sleep a wink!